i have answered the question why me.

and now for a follow up on that;

why you? i have answered that too. i know you still remember what i said. all i said.

there was one observation though, that had me stumped (i was supposed to do the stumping, not you, and then you left and went to bed, grrrrr hahahaha).

you were right. i have loved others before and after you. i have loved them all with the same passion. i only know one way to love and that is without holding back. without any doubt. with all that i have. without any regret.

that does not mean they were all the same though. because although i had been consistent, each one of them had been different. each story i had been included in may have somewhat similar plots written with the same pen, but each one had been special. your word, different. i had the same hopes, i had some of the same thoughts, most even had similar endings. it's the role that i played that distinguishes one from the other.

with you i do not need to play a character.

i never had to. i was just this silly, weird, obsessive person that you somehow still claim to love. you make me think i can do no wrong, cause even if i did you will just look away. i cannot read you, you are the one who sees right through me. you wanna know who i am, everyone else just tries their luck at guessing, and i let them. you let me think i rattle you, when you are the one who unsettles me.

but you know what makes you really odd?

you, wanting to be mine. you, asking how to make me happy. you, wondering if you are good enough for me.

infant at that.

chicken even.

you know more about love than i do.